I Lost My Roots

Contrary to the popular opinion on poetry, I am a fan of many poets’ works. I find the process of trying to understand the author’s cadenced words entertaining and the poetry itself to be beautifully artistic. One such poem that has spoken to me is titled I Lost My Talk by Rita Joe. In her poem, Joe details the importance of one’s true identity–especially that formed by the languages they know and can speak. She also expresses the detriment of losing her identity by conforming to her surroundings. To give some background, author Rita Joe was part of the Mi’kmaq tribe and was forced to adapt to Euro-Canadian culture while attending a residential school in Nova Scotia. Encrypted below is the poem.

I Lost My Talk

Rita Joe 

I lost my talk

The talk you took away.

When I was a little girl

At Shubenacadie school.

 

You snatched it away:

I speak like you

I think like you

I create like you

The scrambled ballad, about my word.

 

Two ways I talk

Both ways I say,

Your way is more powerful.

 

So gently I offer my hand and ask,

Let me find my talk

So I can teach you about me.

Given that her tribe was already endangered, this additional loss of culture was very devastating to her identity. She includes the detail of her young age, expressing that she “was a little girl”, to create a lens of innocence and naiveté. It accentuates the exploitation of Joe’s identity at such a young age and evokes empathy from the reader. Moreover, the use of the second person point-of-view creates a conversational and direct tone. By expressing that “you snatched it away” it’s almost as if she is calling out the reader to introspect into their own experiences; have they ever snatched someone’s uniqueness away by commenting on their nonconforming manners?

The continued anaphora of action phrases with “I” brings the reader’s attention to this specific part of the poem and helps them visualize what it was like for her to adapt to her new surroundings. She continues this sort of repetition with the word “way”, especially emphasizing the contrast between “you” and “I”. Similarly, she likely felt a similar contrast between her true identity and the one that the school wanted her to undertake

Towards the end of the poem, there is a shift in the tone. From words detailing sad memories, she shifts to a gentle, peaceful tone. She almost asks for a compromise, saying she can “teach you” about herself instead of having to change herself to “your” ways. 

This poem has a very lyrical flow that speaks to me not only because of its melodious appeal but because of its meaning too. Though I've grown up in the United States my entire life and have not explicitly had to conform my identity, I’ve had my experiences with shifting my identity too. At times, I feel stuck between two worlds–half of me is too American to be Indian while the other side is too Indian to be “American”. There are certain experiences I have shared growing up in an Indian household that I felt uncomfortable sharing with my peers because I thought it was “weird”. For example, sometimes when I brought Indian food to lunch, I would feel conscious of it even though I had no reason to. On that topic and with a similar style to Joe, I penned the poem below.

I Lost My Roots

i lost my roots

those that were grounded

in my identity

the brown in my skin

the language i speak

the spices in my food

gone.

all i’m left with 

a blank palette

then, i am no different than the rest

i am no different than you

am i just an almond?

brown on the outside

white in the inside

no

i’m better than that

i have a culture

my name is evidence of that

and i have an identity

one that nothing can take away from me